Coming Home!

Tweet

"There's nothing half so pleasant as coming home again." ~Margaret Elizabeth

"

"Love begins by taking care of the closest ones - the ones at home."~Mother Teresa (Notice the Deer) 

"The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned."~Maya Angelou

View from my son's home in Chicago.

"Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that action."~Mother Teresa 

Merry Christmas from Chicago!

Tweet

"The perfect Christmas tree?  All Christmas trees are perfect!" ~Charles N. Barnard

Christmas Eve in Chicago

Wishing Everyone a Wonderful Christmas Day!  I will be back home, blogging, visiting and sharing our adventures very soon!

Hugs and Many Blessings!
Coreen XOXO

Empty Nest again...

Tweet

examiner.com

Well.. almost a completely empty nest again.  I had a wonderful week with my 2 oldest sons visiting from Houston and Chicago.  They came home for 2 friends' wedding that was held yesterday... on 11/11/11, as well as for all the 'events' and festivities that were held earlier in the week. 

The week went way too fast of course, but it was very nice just the same.  This was the first time either had been back since I moved to my new place.  They loved it almost as much as I do.  And we all know how much that is.. right?!  ;-)

My oldest son brought his dog with him; which was an extra special treat for me.  Most of you remember that I had 'custody' of sweet Miss Pickles, the chocolate lab from Louisiana, for 3 years while my son was in grad school.  

She remembered me after about 5 seconds and was very excited as usual about people in general and absolutely any attention.  I was a little worried about her and the deer, however she was very well behaved and neither the deer nor Miss Pickles seemed very concerned with each other.  That was a relief.

My youngest son always likes when his brothers are around and he was able to show them his new job and tell them all about his responsibilities as a kitchen manager.  We are all very proud and happy for him!!

Now it is Saturday evening and both of my older sons are on the roads back to their homes and jobs.  It was a little bitter sweet as I won't get to see at least one of them over the holidays.  I'm hoping to be able to visit one over Christmas or New Years.  Just depends on the driving weather and my new job.  

Holidays can be hard on me; some years more than others.  And it's not really about the boys as much as my having the 'hope' and 'faith' of finding the right person for me to share those times with 'each' year that goes by.  Now don't get me wrong, I am very happy with my life in regards to who I am and how I live my life.  It would just be more 'complete' with someone special. ;-)

Have a wonderful rest of the weekend, Everyone!!

Hugs and Blessings,

Coreen XO

When We Share

Tweet

worldphotocollections.blogspot.com

When We Share...  poet unknown

When we share laughter, there's twice the fun;
When we share success, we surpass what we've done.

When we share problems, there's half the pain;
When we share tears, a rainbow follows rain.

When we share dreams, they become more real;
When we share secrets, it's our hearts we reveal.

If we share a smile, then our love shows;
If we share a hug, then our love grows.

If we share with someone on whom we depend,
That person becomes family or friend.

And what draws us closer and makes us all care,
Is not what we have, but the things that we share.

God Give Me Strength

Tweet

"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." ~Mother Teresa

hubpages.com

Hello Everyone!  I thought I should explain to my followers and friends why I haven't been blogging, writing or visiting more as of late.   I apologize to you all!  I've had a lot going on in my life recently; with school, work, trying to sell my house; getting ready for two very special graduations this week; and being 'hacked' last week.... well my days have been very full. 

Along with everything else, I've been helping my son who's graduating, pack all of his stuff.  He will be moving far away soon... for a new job and a brand new life.  I am so proud and happy for him; but can you hear the tear drops falling?!! ...'sigh'...

Through all of this I have also been thinking about my own life and what I want.  I'm even pondering some 'life changing' decisions.  This is why I'm praying for God to give me strength and direction.

Mother's day was filled with a mix of emotions including: happiness for my 3 sons; pride for their accomplishments; sadness for another one leaving; laughter from the times we have together; and unconditional love from understanding and accepting each other just the way we are.   There were even 'tears'... because... well I'm a woman and a Mom, with so many thoughts and feelings spinning around inside of me right now.  So I ran the whole gamut yesterday and I have a feeling that was only the beginning for this coming week... ;-) 

Except for my Friday Post, I may be absent from blogging for a while longer.  I will fill everyone in as soon as I can... with pictures of course.  Thank you all for your continued friendship, support and 'virtual' Hugs!!  I love you all more than you know!!   XOXO

God give me the strength and direction to do the right things and make the best decisions. Help me to consider others and not harm or offend anyone in any way. Help me to consult with others before I take any actions that would cause me to be sorry. Help me to not make decisions from fear or guilt. Show me the way of Patience, Tolerance, Kindliness, and Love and help me live the spiritual life of faith, peace and love. AMEN

Be Yourself

Tweet

“You can gain more friends by being yourself than you can by putting up a front. You can gain more friends by building people up than you can by tearing them down. And you can gain more friends by taking a few minutes from each day to do something kind for someone, whether it be a friend or a complete stranger. What a difference one person can make!” -Sasha Azevedo

studentbranding.com

Be Yourself   by Ellen Bailey

Why would you want to be someone else

When you could be better by being yourself

Why pretend to be someone you are not

When you have something they haven't got

Cheating yourself of the life you have to live

Deprives others of that only which you can give

You have much more to offer by being just you

Than walking around in someone else's shoes

Trying to live the life of another is a mistake

It is a masquerade; nothing more than a fake

Be yourself and let your qualities show through

Others will love you more for being just you

Remember that God loves you just as you are

To Him you are already a bright shining star

Family and friends will love you more too

If you spent time practicing just being you

“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."~Judy Garland

Half Full Friday & Aloha Friday question of the week!

Tweet

"Fear less, hope more, eat less, chew more, whine less, breathe more, talk less, say more, love more, and all good things will be yours." ~ Swedish Proverb

Half Full Friday is a series of weekly posts that Eye Girl originally started in June 2009.  Now the it is hosted by Sprinkles at Wyldechylde.  We believe that a lot of our happiness is determined by our attitude about the things that happen to us. So by participating, we are deciding to see the glass as half full, instead of half empty. We are choosing to concentrate on the positives, instead of dwelling on the negatives. Our Half Full Friday posts are a way to do just that. They are a list of the things in our life that have brought us happiness over the past week. We are determined to find the something good in every day. Are you?

"It is not how much you do, but how much Love you put into the doing that matters." ~ Mother Teresa

For the next week, we challenge you to keep a list of at least one thing that brought you happiness each day.

"To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another." ~ G.W. Von Leibnitz

This is what I'm Happy for this week:

• I'm happy all 3 of my sons were able to come home for Christmas!

• I'm happy for a 'safe' White & Wonderful Christmas!

• I'm happy I still have followers. :-) ... after being so busy the past 3 weeks and not being able to visit my blogging friends!  I promise things will get back to normal after 2 of my guest leave on Sunday.  Not that I want them to leave... they just are then. :-)

• I'm happy for a productive & very nice Christmas vacation.. with company too!!!

• I'm happy for all the nice Christmas blessings & comments!

• I'm happy my sons are always good to each other... as well as me!!!  I am so proud of them & love them more than anything!!!

‎"No matter what, no matter where, it's always home, if love is there." ~unknown

It's also "ALOHA FRIDAY" Everyone!!  If you want to join in the fun? Post your own question on your blog and leave your link at the Aloha Friday post at An Island Life. Then you can visit the other participants if you wish...It’s a great way to make new bloggy friends or see what people are thinking about this week and join in a conversation or two if you like.

"Enjoy time with your loved ones, smiling, laughing, and enriching the soul." ~ unknown

My question: What simple things at Christmas time, do you appreciate?

My answer: I appreciate spending time with any or all of my sons. Talking, watching football, playing video games with them and just hanging out. I also like going to the candle light church service with them on Christmas eve.
 
Have a 'Safe' and Happy New Years! 

Love & Hugs!

~ Coreen

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas for Moms…..

 Tweet 



theprovince.com

 
Twas the night before Christmas, when all thru the abode
only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
The children were finally sleeping, all snug in their beds,
while visions of X-Box and Barbie, flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
with a half-constructed bicycle propped on his knee.
So only the mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
which made her sigh, “Now what is the matter?”

With toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand,
she descended the stairs, and saw the old man.
He was covered with ashes and soot, which fell with a shrug,
“Oh great,” muttered the mom, “Now I have to clean the rug.”

“Ho Ho Ho!” cried Santa, “I’m glad you’re awake.”
“Your gift was especially difficult to make.”
“Thanks, Santa, but all I want is time alone.”
“Exactly!” he chuckled, “So, I’ve made you a clone.”

“A clone?” she muttered, “What good is that?”
“Run along, Santa, I’ve no time for chit chat.”
Then out walked the clone – The mother’s twin,
same hair, same eyes, same double chin.

“She’ll cook, she’ll dust, she’ll mop every mess.
You’ll relax, take it easy, watch The Young & The Restless.”
“Fantastic!” the mom cheered. “My dream has come true!”
“I’ll shop, I’ll read, I’ll sleep all night through!”

From the room above, the youngest did fret.
“Mommy?! Come quickly, I’m scared & I’m wet.”
The clone replied, “I’m coming, sweetheart.”
“Hey,” the mom smiled, “She sure knows her part.”

The clone changed the small one and hummed her tune,
as she bundled the child in a blanket cocoon.
“You’re the best mommy ever, I really love you.”
The clone smiled & sighed, “And I love you, too.”

The mom frowned and said, “Sorry, Santa, no deal.”
That’s my child’s LOVE she is trying to steal.”
Smiling wisely Santa said, “To me it is clear,
only one loving mother is needed here.”

The mom kissed her child & tucked her in bed.
“Thank you, Santa, for clearing my head.
I sometimes forget, it won’t be very long,
when they’ll be too old for my cradle & song.”

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, “It works every time.”
With the clone by his side Santa said, “Goodnight.
Merry Christmas, dear mom, you will be all right.”
               ~ author unknown


Sometimes, we need reminding of what life is all about. Especially at times during the Holiday season, when all we seem to do is clean and bake and shop and and and and and and……..You get the picture, I’m sure.  

My boys are all home for Christmas this year & we are having a wonderful time!  Brings back so many memories of when they were younger.  They grew up way too fast!!

So stop for a moment and hug that little one so special, whether he/she is 2 or 22, or even older than that. For they are the Gift that God gave us in life….and what a gift to be treasured, far above any other! May the real meaning of Christmas be with you all this year, is my prayer.

Merry 'Christ'mas!!!!!
Blessings & Love to you All!!
~ Coreen

6 Simple Suggestions for Happier Holidays ~ By Alina Mikos

Tweet

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." ~ Melody Beattie

By: Matthias Kabel



The holidays can be emotionally stressful as time, budgets, and patience are stretched to their limits. However, with some planning, perspective, and an increased consciousness about the true spirit of the season, we can create an abundance of happy moments and memories that will give Hallmark a run for its money!


Be Realistic
Going into the holidays with an accurate perspective on what’s in store for you will decrease your frustration and stress. Make a list of your goals: sensible gift giving, holiday cooking and baking, house cleaning, party planning, etc. Tackling your holiday chores one by one will make you feel less overwhelmed and certainly make seasonal preparations more enjoyable. Knowing your financial, physical and scheduling limitations will allow you to set realistic goals that will make you feel satisfied when you complete them (rather than overworked and overemotional as you try to live up to your unrealistic agenda).


Take Time to Detox
Everyone needs a little down time to rejuvenate, and with the holidays draining you quicker with all those seasonal expectations, it’s important to take a little time for yourself. Even with a hectic schedule, you will need to pencil in your refueling time. Whether it’s curling up with a book and a cup of hot cocoa, getting a massage, or meditating and practicing yoga, setting your mind and spirit to rights again will release those building tensions and allow you to accomplish more because you have recharged your emotional batteries.


Keep Within a Budget
Shopping for others can be a rewarding pastime, but those feelings of goodness through gift-giving can easily turn into stress and worry as you deplete your bank account (or worse, rack up credit card charges). By creating a financial budget for yourself, you then have the freedom to make purchases for each person within that specified amount, without the fear of overspending.


Put Differences Aside
Family time offers you the opportunity to be with your loved ones, the people in your life that have known and loved you the longest. It can be a time of catching up, and offers most people a sense of belonging. The less shiny side of that coin can be personality differences that can tarnish your holiday happiness with misunderstandings and arguments. Keeping things in perspective this year, and accepting one another’s differences even if you disagree, will allow you to connect and enjoy the moment: a special time of year with the family you love.


Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle
With the time crunch of the approaching holidays, it is easy to let healthy habits fall to the wayside. Perhaps, then, this is the most important time to keep those routines in place as best you can. Continuing with your exercise regime, and eating at least one healthy meal a day will keep you more balanced, physically and emotionally. It is well known that exercise keeps the endorphins high in your body and gives a natural sense of well-being. Eating right supplies you with the energy you need to accomplish all your tasks and keeps chemical levels (such as serotonin) in balance. This is not to say that you cannot enjoy your holiday sweets and treats! Just keep in mind that most seasonal food tends to be high in fat and sugar, which ultimately cause lethargic and potentially depressive feelings with their energy inhibitors and sugar crashes. So, go ahead, eat those yummy holiday delights— just make sure you balance your diet with nutritious foods that your body needs.


Focus on Holiday Cheer
While the stress of shopping and cooking for others can wear on you, keeping in mind that you are doing these things for others is a great way to stay in high holiday spirits. The holidays are a time for appreciating family and friends, and for thinking of and giving to others. When your goal is to put a smile on someone’s face, that is time well spent indeed. Holiday volunteering at places like children’s hospitals, low-income family centers, and nursing homes, can be another way to keep your head and heart in lively spirits. Giving to others in times of need reaps wonderful spiritual benefits and gives you the perspective to appreciate what you do have. The “demands” don’t seem as great when you acknowledge how fortunate you are to have so many special people in your life to spend your money, time and energy on. ~ By Alina Mikos

My 3 Sons

This is a picture of me with my 3 sons. They are awesome young men and very good to me! They are very close to each other and very respectful and compassionate toward other people. I could not be prouder of my boys!

Michael is my oldest son. He is a powerlifting champion and has also been on the United States Powerlifting team 6 times. Graduated from college and is now in grad school. He is going into the medical field because he truly wants to help people. Says he made the decision from seeing what his youngest brother with Asperger Syndrome, has gone through.

Matthew, my middle son, was leading tackler and All State in high school. He thought he wanted to play college football too, but after one season realized it wasn't fun anymore. So he changed colleges and career direction after his first semester. He is now a graphic designer/brander in Chicago and finishing his bachelor’s degree. So cool!

Brandon is my youngest son and my triple miracle! As most of you know by now, he had Asperger Syndrome. But there is so much more to the story. I had my tubes tied after my second son Matthew was born; another story in itself for another time.

I got pregnant after my divorce from one time; I swear that is totally true. To say I was shocked.. is an understatement. I carried the pregnancy test around in my purse for so long that the pink ‘plus’ sign finally faded.

I had a rough pregnancy while taking care of a 2 and 4 year old by myself. Brandon was born 10 weeks early and only given a 25% chance of making it. He of course made it and will be 20 years old next month. He doesn’t agree, but we all know that he is a Miracle to me, his brothers and anyone who takes the time to know him!

Brandon has overcome so much in his life. He is now in college for Culinary Arts and doing extremely well. He attended 5 schools, before finding a good one ‘for him’ and overcoming his learning difficulties. The school that finally helped him says he is truly a “success story”; and of course he is!

So there is the ‘short’ version of My 3 Sons! I have been and continue to be very blessed by them each and every day! I love them more than anything! This is my family and they are my world!
www.velvetoversteel.blogspot.com

Should Unhappy Parents stay together for their Children? I say No...

My childhood was full of fighting, yelling, name calling and constant turmoil.  My parents were polar opposites who should have never been married, let alone stayed together 'for the kids'.  My dad was a good provider and a kind man, but he had a 'weekend' drinking problem sometimes.  My mother was just very unhappy, and that's what I remember most about her growing up.  At the time I didn't understand why she was so unhappy, but now I do.  I wish my parents had gotten divorced and been happy.

There has always been a Hugh debate on whether parents should stay together for their children.   

A recent on-line discussion at Fluther.com Should a couple ever stay together for the kids? has dozens of people giving their opinions and own stories. Few seem to feel that parents should stay together and most stories tell of unhappy childhoods and relationship problems later as a result.

Another website with opposite stories and opinions, is on the Daily Mail Do parents who stay together cause their children more harm? I wish my parents had divorced. I can totally relate to the first story and although the second author has a positive twist, I still don't feel she was better off.

I know many people who have experienced the damage themselves, as either children raised in unhappy homes or as parents who have experienced living in an unhappy marriage. I personally have experienced both. It's a cycle I finally broke and thankfully learned from.

Unfortunately many couples stay together for money reasons above all else. While money concerns are real, all the money in the world cannot make up for lack of 'peace' in a home.

I personally feel that unhappy parents should not stay together for their children. It's a proven fact that children who either hear verbal fighting and/or see physical fighting; have significant emotional and psychological damage; effecting many aspects in their life; especially their future relationships.

In my own personal experience, it caused much more damage than good. My parents stayed together because of money, and the effects on my self-esteem and relationship issues were horrific.  As an adult, I ended up in several controlling, abusive and dysfunctional relationships.  It took me a long time to overcome the anxiety and negative influences of seeing, hearing and experiencing the drama and even traumatic experiences that I was taught as a child, were normal and OK.

I now realize that people in these situations want to 'believe' those things, because the don't see a way out and justifying, making excuses and believing what they choose to, is one way they 'cope' and get through each day.

I remember after my own divorce, the feeling of 'calm' in the house and how my sons were more relaxed and happier.  My only regret was not giving my children a 'peaceful' home sooner than I did, because even 8 years later, I can still see the negative effects of exposing them to the drama they heard and saw for far too long.  I regret that more than anything else in my life.

More on this subject:
Staying for the kids sake
Can Unhappy Parents Raise Happy Children?
Together for the kids
Living a Lie

The Narcissistic Co-dependent Marriage/Relationship Symptoms

Finding that 'ONE' right man.

After my divorce several years ago, I started meeting new friends and going out.  I quickly rememembered why I didn’t date much in high school.  Because dating can be uncomfortible and even scary at times. 

In the last 5 years I have dated quite a bit. Most have only been 1st dates, where I knew right away they were not the ‘ONE’ I was looking for. So I didn’t accept another date. Others I thought could be, so I went on a few more dates. I then either realized I didn’t feel what I should. Or I saw red flags, and RAN!

At times I’ve been told that I don’t give even the nice guys a chance. So I've gone on some second dates, just to make sure they were not the ‘One’. But that has never changed my initial intuition or gut feeling.  It has only confused and hurt some good men. Which is never my intention and I always feel bad when that happens.

I dated one man who was very nice, but who lived 2 hours away.  At that time in my life, I didn’t have the strength or energy for a long distance relationship. Another man I dated a few times seemed very nice at first.  I quickly realized that he was controlling and manipultive.  He just didn't want to be alone and wanted someone to take care of him.  Actually, I've met more than a few men like that the last 5 years.

Several other men I briefly went out with were very angry and bitter toward their ex-wives or girlfriends. I don’t want someone who is angry or bitter.  Life is too short for that.  So I knew right away that none of them were the 'one' for me either.

Then of course there were the smooth, sweet talking men who were only after one thing. These men were all very self-centered with little or no real respect for women. They go from one pretty flower to the next with no intention of building a lasting relationship. These types of men get angry when a woman wants to wait until she is sure where the relationship is going.  Men like this are never the 'one' for any women.  This is why all women should have ‘rules’ or standards if you will.  Having standards gets rid of men like this very quickly.

I believe there should be more depth and meaning in a relationship than just self gratification and living in the moment. ~ “If you’re not worth the wait, it’s a sure sign they are NOT the ‘ONE’!” ~Me

Another complaint I've heard is that I’m too picky.  I disagree with that perspective too.  It's not that I'm too critical.  It's that I know exactly what qualities I’m looking for in a man.  There is a difference!  In the past I have lacked self-esteem and almost settled for less than what I deserve.  So a few years ago I raised the bar.  Since then some men have argued that my ‘bar’ is set too darn high! My response to that is ‘it’s about time’!

I’m an extremely passionate person, with emotions that run very deep.  That is who I am!  I want to be with someone who appreciates those characteristics and truely understands me! Someone with similar beliefs, family values and a positive attitude!  A man with the same heart and soul as myself, if at all possible.  I’m waiting for that ‘ONE’!

"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." ~Sam Keen