Good over Evil

 "I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality.  This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant." ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

In my lifetime I've seen so many tragedies resulting from evil in this world.  From the horrific events we all see in the news; to the very personal ones that have happened around me. 

Back home in a town of 500, a young boy was shot for no reason by a neighbor, while visiting relatives with his brother.  I remember how fearful I was to let my children out of my sight after that.

Years later while my sons were still in school, a favorite teacher was killed by her husband in a horrific tragedy that left their 3 children without both parents in the end.  I shocking event for all the children in the school community.  

A year or two later, a beloved friend and her son tragically killed by a drunk driver.  The entire community mourned including my sons whom loved these 2 people like family.  Heart wrenching and so hard to understand why or how these things can happen.

I remember my friend and her son's funeral service so vividly.  The Pastor of our church talked about how God doesn't let bad things happen.  That bad things happen because Evil/Satan is in the world and because God gave us free will, allowing some to choose evil or make bad decisions; such as driving drunk unfortunately.  

I don't believe that God causes any of these tragedies to happen.  That is free will or the evil in the world.  What I believe is that God is there for us when those things happen; to comfort us and to bring people together.  I also believe that he uses bad, even tragic situations to teach us lessons for the greater good.  Lessons in love, compassion, appreciation, acceptance and even forgiveness.  Which help us to see that there truly is more good in the world than bad.  The evils of the world will not push me out of believing there is good in the world; or away from God.

 "At the end of the day, good will triumph, even though, we at the time, can not see it." ~unknown 

Find Strength from Every Lesson

"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do.  But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength." ~Unknown

"Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness.  Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.  Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength."~August Wilson

Accept all that is given to you with an open mind.  Every event is a gift, whether it warmed your heart or brought you disappointment.  Everything is a blessing for reasons we can't always see or know in the moment.  Learn from yesterday, live for today, plant seeds for tomorrow using your inner strength to live a life worth living.

"I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within."~Anonymous

The philosophy of life is to make the most of it.  So enjoy the happy moments for sure, but see the lessons in the challenges thrown at you too.  Everything can happen for a reason if you view life with an open mind and heart; to see the lessons that give you the wisdom and strength to follow the paths that God leads you on all throughout your life.  

"Few men during their lifetime come anywhere near exhausting the resources dwelling within them.  There are deep wells of strength that are never used."~Richard E. Byrd

Moving On with Your Life

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"You are responsible for your life. You can't keep blaming somebody else for your dysfunction. Life is really about moving on." ~Oprah Winfrey

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"To be able to move on, one has to learn to forgive not only the person (or people) who have done one wrong but also oneself." ~Eugenia Tripputi

Like everyone else, I've made numerous mistakes in my life.  I've let people get to me, take advantage of me, and I accepted way less than I deserved both in treatment and respect.   

However, I've learned from each of those experiences, including the bad choices that I've made... but learned from.  Mostly because I have taken responsibility for my actions and my own life, instead of making excuses or blame someone else (at least I try not to).

So even though there are some things I can never get back and people who will never be sorry, I will know better next time to be more cautious.  With my recent move I have made a vow to myself, that from now on I will not settle for anything less than what I deserve in both life and love.  To me, that is truly moving on with your life. :-) 

"I've built a wall not to block anyone out, but to see who loves me enough to climb over it." ~author unknown

Having Grace...

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 “Gracefulness has been defined to be the outward expression of the inward harmony of the soul” ~William Hazlitt

What is Grace?  The dictionary offers these definitions:
1. elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action.
2. a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment.
3. Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people.

None of us are or will ever be even close to perfect.  I don't expect it in myself or look for perfection in others by any means.  How we live our lives and treat others ... is what's important.  To me if you have Grace, it's truly in your heart... and that is what matters!

Marianne Williamson, in her book Everyday Grace, teaches that Having Grace is having Hope, Finding Forgiveness and Making Miracles happen.  She says that having Grace is having it 'all come together'!  I totally agree.

Having Grace inside of us is when we show kindness, compassion, beauty and love toward others.  It's an attractiveness, charm, gracefulness, and ease that radiates inward and out.

Having Grace towards other people is the ability to overlook a lot in their lives – not that you have to overlook everything, but that you ought to be able to ignore a lot of failures and blemishes and imperfections.  Grace increases your threshold of tolerance instead of increasing your expectations.  Grace makes it possible for people to have lots of second chances.  Just like you and I constantly have from God.

“Grace isn't a little prayer you chant before receiving a meal. It's a way to live.” ~Jackie Windspear

I found the following article and poem while researching this post.  They both explain Grace in everyday lives and well worth sharing.  Enjoy!

Grace... vs Karma   by Faith

Grace transcends karma. When you “get” a lesson without either blaming someone or exacting revenge, when you learn how to forgive and say thank you for every experience you have, then you are learning how to apply Grace to your life. When you give up feeling as though you are a victim of circumstances, Grace enters quietly. Grace frees you from having to repeat lessons over and over again. It’s your get out of jail free card!

Grace does not struggle. Grace simply observes. Grace does not judge. Grace sees the perfection in everyone. Grace is the act of being grateful and thankful. Grace finds peaceful solutions to every situation. Grace chooses to walk away from discord, into the arms of love.

Karma means cause and effect. For every action, there is an equal and measurable reaction. For example, you find your spouse and your best friend cheating on you. If you choose to keep the karmic wheel in motion, you would choose to hate them both and exact some form of revenge on them for their deceitfulness. Perhaps you’d play the victim role instead – you’d become bitter and spiteful. You’d never trust anyone again and you’d make sure that everyone knew how horrible your ex-spouse and best friend had treated you. Then in another lifetime, you would have the opportunity to do the same thing to the people who betrayed you…and so on.

If you choose Grace, however, you would work at forgiving them both. Through prayer, meditation, patience and gentleness with yourself, there would no longer be any more lessons like that one, ever again!

The soul is immortal. Everyone is family beyond the veil. We choose our roles and not everyone chooses to be “the good guy” while on earth. However, the villains that we love to hate, are made from the same cosmic dust as everyone else. The victimizers must play their roles convincingly, so that their victims will have an opportunity to either forgive them through the Law of Grace – or not through the Law of Karma.

Countries have karma, too – and cities – and families. There is individual karma and planetary karma. Applying the Law of Grace to every situation can, in time, clear all of it away.

The next time you find yourself in a difficult situation where you have a choice to make, challenge yourself to take a deep breath and choose Grace. Through the act of forgiveness, divine intelligence will help you to let go and transcend the situation. Soon you will find yourself moving forward and you will forget the pain of betrayal. Observe how much lighter you feel after having chosen the path of Grace. ~ by Faith

“Like any other gift, the gift of grace can be yours only if you'll reach out and take it. Maybe being able to reach out and take it is a gift too.” ~ author unknown

Grace...   by: Sri Chinmoy

"Grace is our true meal. A true devotee can really and truly live on God's Grace. The Bible has taught us, "Man does not live by bread alone." This is true; but I wish to say that man can live by God's Grace alone. If a spiritual person, an aspirant, really cares for God's Grace, then I wish to say that he can live by God's Grace constantly and eternally.

God's Grace is God's self-revealing, self-fulfilling eternal Existence. We have to know that it is God's Grace that will give us illumination, liberation and realisation. The infinite life, the eternal life, God's infinite wealth will belong to the aspirant who really cares for the Supreme's Grace, which is our only meal.

10 Ways to Beat the Holiday Blues ~ By Alina Mikos

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The holidays can be a high-pressure time of year, chock-full of expectations, temptations and potential disappointments. If we can make pre-emptive strikes against the upcoming challenges by neutralizing potential triggers, we have a sporting chance at turning around those end-of-the-year blues.

1. Set Realistic Goals
Evaluating and accepting which of your holiday goals are attainable without running yourself into the ground allows you to enjoy your accomplishments, instead of feeling disappointed for failing to complete all of your self-imposed holiday tasks. Being honest with yourself about your time, money and energy limitations will go a long way towards achieving a sense of happiness and satisfaction this season.

2. Don’t Overindulge
Alcohol and sweets are unavoidable holiday temptations, and an abundant feature of every party and dinner you attend. Enjoying these in moderation can add to the holiday spirit, as long as you don’t go overboard. Alcohol is a well-known depressant, which in high doses heightens a gloomy disposition. The same goes for a high sugar intake, which provides a temporary energy rush, quickly followed by a sugar crash (decreasing serotonin levels in the body), and a feeling of weakness and fatigue.

3. Enlist Recruits
There’s no need to take on every holiday responsibility. If you feel overwhelmed with chores, divvying them up amongst friends and family is a great way to spend time with those closest to you during this festive season while getting things done. The less stress you feel, the less likely you will feel over-burdened and depressed.

4. Venture Into Volunteerism
Making time to help those in need will make you feel useful and appreciated, and takes you out of your daily life and schedule. Giving of yourself makes you appreciate what you do have in life; and as you bring smiles to others’ faces, your face will reflect that joy.

5. Don’t Break the Bank
Carefully calculate your holiday expenses and hold to your budget. There’s no quicker route to depression than feeling hopeless about money. When you overspend on seasonal shopping, you diminish your delight in the holidays by increasing your financial worries.

6. Use Nostalgia Positively
This time of year can be a time of reflection, and if you have lost someone through death, divorce or a break-up, your sense of loss can easily make you feel overwhelmed. It’s important to focus on the good memories you have of that person, appreciating what they’ve brought into your life and how those positive memories will forever be a part of you. Staying present and celebrating who’s in your life today is another way to beat the nostalgia blues.

7. Pitch the Perfectionism
The expectations for a perfect holiday can drive anyone mad. It’s great to have pride in your work (cooking, decorating, gift giving), but obsessing over these things will definitely not make your holidays happy. Agree to put a certain amount of effort into each project, and then pat yourself on the back for a job well done.

8. Forgiveness
During this family-oriented time of year, try to move past any judgments and arguments that you may have with a family member. Harboring ill feelings can be a heavy burden, and you might be pleasantly surprised at how much lighter and happier you feel when you can let go of any resentments and enjoy this time of year with those you love.

9. Identify Escapism
Sometimes people use the holidays to avoid the realities and problems of their daily lives. It’s easy to plunge yourself into the projects that characterize the season; but if part of your whirlwind of activities is an effort to escape from your problems, you will certainly feel depressed at some point as things start to slow down. In this regard, accepting your situation and taking steps every day to improve it is the only answer to making a happier life for yourself. If you hide behind escapism – like excessive vacations, mountains of movies and books, or holiday fervor – your problems will persist, and eventually sap your energy and joy.

10. Nurture Yourself
Keeping yourself balanced through exercise, relaxation, sleep, and a healthy diet is a crucial component of a happy mind. With the added stressors of the holidays, these factors deserve even more attention. Observing these checks and balances will enable you to conquer the challenges of the holidays with an abundance of energy and an appreciation for the true spirit of the season.

By Alina Mikos
 

The Art of True Forgiveness By Phoenix Adoni



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“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.” ~ Robert Muller

When I look back on my life, I realize how much time I’ve wasted, how many beautiful moments lost and forgotten. Nothing really touched, no one really seen – not even me.

I’ve come to realize that so much of my life was spent holding onto the past – to resentments, blame, guilt and anger. And it was this resentful past that I was holding onto – keeping it alive – that I was projecting onto others and creating a predictable future of more resentments, more anger, more suffering.

My awakening came from a deep loss that caused me to stop, and I was given the gift of seeing myself clearly – my past, my present, my future and the interconnection of it all. I stopped running, and finally saw how angry I was at the people of my past, for the perceived wrongs, the slings and arrows thrown deep within my heart – and more importantly, the anger, the blame, the soul-numbing guilt and unforgiveness I’ve held myself hostage with.

I soon discovered that true forgiveness is letting go of the past and begins with truly forgiving myself for the situations, the pain and suffering I caused for others, realizing that I was doing the best I could at the time, regardless of how unconscious I was. I am not the same person I was a year ago, let alone ten minutes ago – I, we – are all evolutions in the moment of making.

True forgiveness is about forgetting. I grew up hearing, “I’ll forgive, but I won’t forget.” This, to me, is not truly forgiving. By not forgetting, the past is still kept alive in the present and its accompanied resentment. It’s not really forgiven from the depths of my life, honestly looking at myself and seeing that at some point in my life, I have done or made the same choices that have hurt another.

This isn’t to say that I’ve become a doormat for people to hurt me again, treat me badly, or dump their laundry off at my doorstep. It’s a paradox but, as I learn to forgive and forget, I’m now taking better care of myself – setting healthy boundaries, speaking up for myself and finally embracing my own power – at home within.

I’ve asked myself, as I ask you, what exactly I’m getting out of not forgiving another? I discovered that it was a way to protect myself from feeling the fullness and richness of the hurt, the pain, and its subsequent growth.

But more importantly, it was a method of punishment, by withholding my love and casting them out of my life. But in the end, I realized that it was me I was withholding love from, and without love for myself, without forgiveness for myself and others, how could I expect to ever truly love another?

By not forgiving myself, my past and the people of it, I was miserable, becoming hardened, more angry and living in my head rather than my heart. I was slowly killing my spirit, depriving it of the love it needed to ensure its survival. I again had to ask myself, as I ask you, is this worth it? Is my happiness and peace worth the anger and blame and suffering? I said “No.” Maybe you will, too. It was my first step in healing my heart. Perhaps it will be yours as well.

Practicing forgiveness is a life-long process that never ends, but leads to the mastery of life and love. That’s not to say that we’re not human – I still struggle and have difficulties forgiving at times, but as I practice, my time in peace increases. I’m realizing that forgiving truly is an art, for when I truly forgive, my heart warmly opens, overflows with love, and as each one of us practices this gentle art, our love for ourselves grows, extends to all people, and paints the rich tapestries of each holy moment that we call our lives.  By Phoenix Adoni

“Sincere forgiveness isn't colored with expectations that the other person apologize or change. Don't worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them. Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time.” ~ Sara Paddison