Facing our fears to move Forward

"Sometimes you can't move forward until you come face to face with the fears that have been holding you back."~Me

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My greatest weakness in life has been the ability to stand up for myself.  It's been pointed out to me time and again that it's because no one ever stood up for me as a child.  That is when children are suppose to learn that vital skill by watching adults stand up, even fight for them.  That would explain why it's always been difficult for me and why I would rather be the peacemaker than the fighter.

After feeling suppressed and even trapped at times, I needed to leave my comfort zone in order to get to a better place both physically and emotionally.  Being pushed to overcome fears in order to stand up for myself and move forward.  Fears of consequences, making the wrong decisions, steep learning curves and even security.

I can clearly see now where facing each of those fears has been the best for me every step, every time.  
I shut the door on people and environments that were not good for me; opened up opportunities; gained more job skills; and stood up for myself more times than any other period in my life.

In every situation where I face a fear and put myself in a new situation or environment, I meet amazing people that inspire me to find my voice more and more while fighting for what I believe in.  I've formed new relationships with people that have the same values, morals or beliefs that I do.  Those with the integrity and character that I strive for and want to associate with.

There have been no regrets when looking back this past year.  I believe I needed each experience, situation, person and lesson to be where I am right now.  Every fear I face leads me to opportunities to use my voice to fight for what I believe in.  Facing our fears does move us forward!

"It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hid them; more strength to relate to people than to dominate them; more integrity to have thought-out principles rather than blind reflex; more character to do what's right than to follow the crowd."

Searching for Happiness

"We search so much for the right choices, the right paths to walk through, the right time, the right reasons, and the right person.  But life isn't just about searching for things.  It's also about letting the unexpected happen and finding joy in things and people we never searched for..." ~Author Unknown 

"While we search our whole lives to find happiness, we sometime miss the opportunities around us.  We're too busy searching for something specific that we think will make us happy.  We need to stop searching long enough to appreciate and enjoy the spontaneous surprises of each day.  Only when we embrace all of life's experiences, large and small, can we find what we.re looking for... happiness that's already inside each of us." ~ME

Rolling with the Punches...

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"Happy people roll with the punches.  They know from experience that everything changes.  Today's good fortune may vanish tomorrow, today's crises may turn out to be tomorrow's good fortune." ~unknown

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Sometimes in life you just have to Roll with the Punches, even when the punches feel like they are coming from a pro boxer... and yes, there is a connection.  


The phrase Roll with the Punches originally comes from the technique used in boxing.  The objective is to avoid receiving a direct hit with solid contact.  The technique is to move away from the punch in an attempt to avoid the blow or at least create a glancing blow. A glancing blow being preferable to a direct hit.  Today is means to "Weather through tough times, try to minimize the trouble." 


It can be hard to not get upset or flustered when things start to go wrong and times get rough.  But when the rough and tumble comes, some people are much better at just getting on with it, plugging away and in short, rolling with the punches.


In boxing those who take the punches as well as possible, rather than avoiding them completely, can apparently actually do better in boxing than those who always do everything they can to avoid any punches, and so the phrase of rolling with the punches for anyone who takes what life throws at them, no pun intended.


I realized after a conversation with a new friend recently, that I indeed have learned to roll with the punches.  Taking the punches many times, instead of trying to always avoid them, and becoming stronger and wiser as a result.


How about you?  Can you think of times where you've 'rolled with the punches' and became stronger, wiser or a better person over all?

"You've got to roll with the punches to get to what's real" -Van Halen 

The Purpose of Life is to Live It

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Remembering Lifes Purpose

"We each have an important role to fulfill during this journey we call life. The things we absorb along the way can sometimes leave us feeling overwhelmed, confused, and not sure which direction to follow. Recall, Reclaim, and begin working toward fulfilling the purpose for which you were sent and you will find new meaning, joy, fulfillment, and a sense of deep inner peace in each and every area of your life."  ~by Chuck Danes

"Life was meant to be lived, and curiosity must be kept alive. One must never, for whatever reason, turn his back on life." ~Eleanor Roosevelt

Spiritual Connection

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“Rather than basing our relationships primarily on human personality attractions, we tend to be drawn to those with whom we have mutual experiences and significant soul connections.” ~Anna Ellington

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Love is a Spiritual energy.  Passion may arouse and increase enthusiasm, physical pursuits may be momentarily pleasurable, but the deep love energy flowing between two people with a spiritual connection, flows in unspoken words.  A stirring in the heart untouched, the sense inflamed just with a sensory thought of the other. The warmth pouring from the eyes of a loving glance thrown by one to another.  Two souls in perfect synchronicity... spiritually connected and aligned. 

Without spiritual bonding there is no deep sensitivity, empathy or understanding.  The two people may be attracted to each other physically but remain thirsted and needful of substantiation.  Love of this type has suppressed energy.   

Spiritual love is far more powerful and potent and doesn't require any effort or invention on ones part, for it inspires, warms, regenerates, strengthens, radiates light from within, and fans an eternal flame of love within ones heart. Truly a Spiritual Connection... and a Love of a lifetime.

“The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between your minds, your hearts, and your souls, the more you will strengthen the fabric of your relationship, and the more real moments you will experience together.” ~Barbara De Angelis

How I'm living my Life...

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"Risk more than others think is safe...

Care more than others think is wise.

Dream more than others think is practical...

Expect more than others think is possible."
~Cadet Maxim

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 I read this quote and thought 'this is exactly how I'm living my life'!  You can tell by the repeated words 'others think' that the author must have gotten some negative feedback or advice in her life.  I can relate to that.

I've gotten lots of negative opinions as advice in my life, as with everyone.  Over the years, I've gotten stronger, wiser and learned to do what I feel is right, no matter what others think or say.  I admit it's hard sometimes; even draining when it's people you have in your daily life.  However, as long as I'm doing what feels right; which means I'm not feeling any anxiety or guilt; then I usual prove the naysayers wrong.  Not that I get admissions very often, but I know (big smile) and that's all that matters.  

Years ago I would cringe at negative comments.  Often doubting my decision and even changing my mind at times from the pressure I felt.  I obviously didn't trust or believe in myself back then.  Maybe I tried too hard to fit in or gain approval.  I suppose it depended on the circumstances.  At any rate, that is one of the areas I've grown the most in.

This 'process', as with most, took time and self awareness.   I am very thankful for the experiences that have gotten me to where I am today.  I now take risk without remorse, care without regret, dream without limits and expect the happiness I deserve.  This is why I feel that I'm truly 'Living my Life'!

"I'm doing the best that I can, doing it in a way that I feel is right. I'm living my life!" ~ME
"There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, love & pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living."~Lisa Yance

Having a Life... outside of our responsibilities.

Although my sons are grown pretty much on their own now, I remember how I tried to balance everything when they were growing up.  Dividing the time and attention between the three was my top priority.  Balancing family, my home daycare, housekeeping, friendships, school groups, a marriage, church.... the list went on and on. 

I remember long, busy days and collapsing at night from exhaustion.  However I also remember how fulfilled and happy I was taking care of my family!   I love being a mom, then and now!  

The hardest part for me was when they grew up and one by one needed me less.  I felt so lost and empty at times.  Then one day I filled out an on-line questionnaire and realized I didn't have a life.  At least... not one of my own! 

The Questions and Answers went like this: 

Interest:  my children
Hobbies:  my children
Activities:  my childrens'
Goals:  raising my children
Dreams:  helping my children fulfill their dreams.

The questions went on and the answers were basically the same.  This experience was a Hugh eye opener for me.  I didn't even know what I liked or who I was... outside of being a MOM.

Please remember I loved raising my sons and being involved in their activities along with the groups associated with them.  I still enjoy and cherish the time I spend with my boys now.  However, I decided that it was about time for 'me'.  My dreams, goals and interest.  Whatever the heck they were.... I still didn't know for a while. 

Since that revelation, I have spent a great deal of time experiencing new and exciting things.  I had my very own adventures and done things I'd never done before.  All good of course, but fun too!   I'd never rafted before, road a motorcycle, drove a jet sky or even gone tubing until last summer.  I had a blast!

I've always been pretty social, but I used to avoid anything remotely risky and would even slip into the shadows to avoid being in the spot light too much.  This year I've stepped it up; putting myself in new and very exciting places.  Meeting some amazing people and coming out of my shell!

These new experiences have helped me grow and develop into a strong, independant and confident person.  I am very pleased with how far I have come and look forward to the rest of my life!

It's never too late to have a Life of your own.  What interest, hobbies or adventures do you have outside of your responsibilities?
 

Don't tell too much, too soon!

Many times over the past several years while dating, I have many times talked too much about my past dates and relationships, even to people I barely knew. I had convinced myself that I needed to be completely open and honest, with everyone, in order to find someone else that was honest. I realized later that too much information, too soon, is a Hugh mistake for many reasons.

For one, it scares the heck out of most men!  And two, the past is just that the past.  No one is perfect and we have all made mistakes.  What is going on in our lives right now, along with who we are at the present time, is what and should be all that matters.

Most of our past experiences happened for a reason.  In my case, it has made me the complete person I am today.  I now appreciate all that has happened and look for the lesson in each experience.  I could not have grown, learned or matured without those experiences.  I truly like the person I am today.

I also realize now that when the right person comes along for us, no amount of past or road blocks are going to keep you from them.  If two souls are meant to be together, they will be.  However, no matter how hard we try to rush things, it will happen in God's timing and not always in ours.  So be patient and believe that the right person, at the right time, will come into your life and they will!
 

Half Full Friday! June 25th

Half Full Friday is a series of weekly posts that Eye Girl originally started in June 2009.

We believe that a lot of our happiness is determined by our attitude about the things that happen to us. So by participating, we are deciding to see the glass as half full, instead of half empty. We are choosing to concentrate on the positives, instead of dwelling on the negatives. Our Half Full Friday posts are a way to do just that. They are a list of the things in our life that have brought us happiness over the past week.

"Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day." ~ Author Unknown

We are determined to find the something good in every day.  Are you?

For the next week, we challenge you to keep a list of at least one thing that brought you happiness each day. On Friday, write your own Half Full Friday post and return to Life As Eye See It to link your post and to see what other bloggers found happiness in during the past week.

Don't forget to grab a Half Full Friday Banner or Button for your blog post if you are going to join in:

This is my third time joining Half Full Friday and here is what I'm Happy for this week:

• I am happy that I got to attend the 'Get Motivated' Event on Monday! 
• I am happy that I got to see so many Amazing Speakers this week! 
• I am happy that I completed the '8 to Great' Certification training!  It was life changing! 
• I am happy I met MK Mueller, her staff and all the wonderful people in my class!
• I am happy that my "8 to Great" training group will contine to keep in touch! 
• I am happy that I attended the SBAM breakfast Thursday and met author,Wendy Townley!
• I am happy for my experiences, training, and personal growth this week!
• I am happy that I still have 3 more days off to rest and write about my recent experiences! :-)

Have a Great weekend, Everyone!
Love & Hugs Always my Friends,
Coreen